


Welcome to the Old West

by Madamfluffykins



Category: Original Work
Genre: Action/Adventure, Adventure, Afterlife, Car Accidents, Cowboys, Death, F/F, Hell, Satan - Freeform, warriors - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-23
Updated: 2016-12-22
Packaged: 2018-09-11 07:05:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,442
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8964757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Madamfluffykins/pseuds/Madamfluffykins
Summary: Who knew Hell was just a ghost town?





	1. Beginning of the End

My life started when it ended. It started when I got into a car, a week after I turned eighteen. When Fate decided my life was going to take a strange path.

I suppose I should start with an introduction. My name’s Harley and I was eighteen. I had a dad and a mom, good grades, and a pleasant little house in the small town of Kobes, in Oregon. A week after my birthday, I got into my car for the first time. It was a gift from my grandpappy, who died a week before my 18th birthday. The car was a gift he kept hidden for years, one he painstakingly worked on for most of my life, just to restore it to its old glory.

But I digress. I got into the car and buckled up. I passed by a graveyard, where Grandpappy was buried. I looked out the window, and sighed. If only he was here, if only I could thank him for this beautiful car. I kept driving, my thoughts now on him. I know I should have been paying better attention to th icy winter road, but as they say, hindsight is 20-20. 

I was driving past some woods when it happened. A deer dashed into the road, and in my panic, I yanked the wheel to the left. The tires lost traction on the ice, and my car tumbled off of the road. The car flipped over three times, then crashed into a tree. I had only a second to process this, when the tree fell over and I tumbled down a large hill into a boulder. I was hurt, my mind was going foggy. I just made out a deer, the same one from the road I thought in my daze, the one with a white spot over its eye. It sniffed me once, nodded, and dashed off. That was the last thing I saw before blackness overtook my vision. 

 

Then, I died.


	2. Chapter One

I heard sirens. I saw several ambulances, and a helicopter. I saw my car, the precious work of art my Grandpapy worked on for years just a pile of smoking metal. I saw my dad and my mom, weeping outside an ambulance. I saw my body.

I looked terrible. My head was bashed in, my arms splayed at angles that should never be possible. The medics were explaining to my parents that I went quickly, that I never felt any pain. I suppose they were right, I don’t remember any pain at all. Just a brief feeling of suffocation, and then nothing.

I wondered what would happen now. What happens to people who die? Was I stuck on Earth, or would some sort of Grim Reaper come to collect me? I sighed and leaned against a tree. Surprisingly, I didn’t faze through. I stayed there for what felt like hours, but was probably only a couple of minutes, before a figure wearing a white gown and carrying a crossbow across her back appeared before me.

“Are you God?” I asked, partially relieved and partially terrified; what if this wasn’t Go, bu t some sort of demon?  
The being laughed and grabbed my hand. I felt a brief tug at my chest, and then we were standing in what I could only call a ghost town. I looked around and saw that there was no sky, only a cavern of darkness that led up to some stalactites. I looked to my left, the figure was still there. She led me to a man dressed in a cowboy hat and riding a horse. He had brown trousers on and a vest with a plastic badge that said ‘sheriff’ on it.  
“So you’re our newest recruit?” He said in what was the worst western accent I have ever heard, “Come with me, come with me, I’ll show you your quarters.” He grabbed my hand and dragged me to what looked like an inn, then into a long hallway. He knocked on the wall a few times before five people came out of different doors. There was a young man wearing a suit and tie, with a sword strapped to his waist. A woman with pigtails and wearing a flowery dress stood holding hands with a woman who was wearing overalls and a tee shirt. The woman from before was there, also, her crossbow in her hands. A man with a crazy looking grin and holding a shotgun was picking his teeth. There was a girl holding a mace, wearing pajamas with little ducks on them.

“So, this here is, um,” The man who led me here looked at his hand, “Harley. They died in a car accident. Looks like their weapon is a…” He paused and stuck a hand in his pocket, before pulling a trident out, “Trident! Treat them well, gang!”


	3. Chapter Two

He left, and the people in the hallway started clapping. The man with the crazy grin strode up to me and looked me over, like I was a piece of meat.  
“Heya, new kid.” He said, “Do ya know what’s going on, or do I have ta explain it all ta ya?”  
I was a bit perturbed. What, exactly, was going on? Why was Heaven (or Hell?) a literal ghost town, of all things? I realized I was just looking at everyone with my mouth open.   
“No, uh, I have no idea what is going on here.” I replied.  
The man nodded, like this was a common thing. He took my hand, and led me to a door at the end of the hall. Opening the door, he pushed me inside, roughly. I did a quick look and saw a medium sized room, with a large bed with ornate covers on it. There was a large window, overlooking a pub across the street. A door was open, leading to a bathroom.

“Well, this is your room.” The boy says, “And this is Hell.” 

Ah, well, suppose that makes sense. Where else would a desert be in the afterlife? 

He continues talking, “And we are the Eternals. A gang of dead humans who spread justice tbrought the Mortal Plane.”

“Wait, justice?” I interrupt, ‘Did you not say this was Hell? As in, Satan, and demons, and eternal torture?”

He rubs his neck. “Well, ah yes. That happens elsewhere. Here, it’s more like a shared area with God. Lucifer has control here, he’s our boss, but he teamed up with God to make us. Even he has limits to what he can tolerate, ya see. That brings us to us. Every once in a while, a human dies and is sent here, to protect every living thing in the Mortal Plane.”  
“We don’t know why or how we’re chosen. I died protecting my family from a robber, so it might be bravery. But Jane, the woman in the pajamas in the hallway, died from being scared by a clown and tripping down a hill. So it is probably not bravery. Not even Cruz, the weird western tour guide and bartender who brought you to the Inn, knows. I think it’s top level security, held by Lucifer himself.”

“So what we do know is how to travel between planes. When it is day on Earth, we are here. When it is night, we return to the Mortal Realm in our old bodies, as if we never died. Our families think it’s some kind of miracle. Dead child back to life and all that Discovery channel jazz. The way we return here is by either dying in the Mortal Plane, or when the sun goes up. The moment it does, we are transported back her and our families are left wondering where we went.”

“Now, I bet you’re wondering about time zones. Ya see, we’re all from Oregon here. No clue why Oregon, but I guess it makes sense with timing.”

I tried to comprehend what he’s saying. I’m some sort of Warrior of Lucifer, but also a human? 

“Wait, so I have to come here?” I question.

“Yes, you do. It’s our job. We meet here, plan, then go back to the Mortal Plane to kick ass. Sometimes it’s rouge demons or angels, elementals, or just really shitty humans. You’ll like it here. Most of us do, at least. Hell, I like it here so much whenever I go back to the mortal Plane at night I just off myself and return here. It’s nice, and Cruz makes a decent margarita for a western stereotype come to life.” He finishes with a bow, then a quick usher into the hall, “Time to meet you fellow Warriors, Harley.”


End file.
